Monday, April 04, 2005
all my files!!! gone!! argh what the fuck. my dad sent the computer for reformatting or something and all my files have been completely wiped out.
oh well. shit happens. no worries. what's a few files to me anyway? tralala.
just finished doing the literature report. some shit about r.k.narayan. he's dead.
wearing my new specs. i must say i feel rather intellectual. but they are freak-heavy and all i can see is black.
cant type a long post today, sorry. i have to go to sleep, or i won't wake up tomorrow.
no, i have to blog. just a bit more.
i asked myself this question. and im still thinking of the answer.
what the hell am i doing in anderson???
study, you say. O-levels, you say. friends, you say. cca, you say.
the truth is, i have no idea. im definitely not in for the studies. O-levels? wherever i go, i'll still have to think about the big Os. even if i go fuchun sec or some other direlict school. cca? looking at the shit drama has caused for me these past few weeks...i'd say not.
i guess that leaves friends then. the truth is, i don't know about this part. i honestly don't feel attached to the school at all. people get so emotional about their past classes and eveything, but i don't feel as much. maybe there's something wrong with me or maybe im just being a bitch but you know??
don't get me wrong, i love my friends.
it's just that i don't feel that attachment. no matter how close or how long i am to a person, i don't want to stay with him or her forever. i just want to keep moving on.
i still remember the last day of school last year. i didn't shed a tear. not even one. and i still haven't. i saw people crying bucketloads but it didn't affect me a single bit!! what the fuck is wrong with me?
not that i want to be bawling my eyes out in school. i mean, we'll still see each other in school. its not like we're all going to die the next day. what's the use of reliving past memories? sure, it was great while it lasted, but its time to GET ON.
now, please don't come and bombard me with class photos and shove them in my face while screaming and calling me a cold-hearted bitch. because im not.
okay that's all. i better stop. good night!
funkadelic @ 5:52 AM
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